Sunday, October 6, 2013

Living life

"Live the life you have imagined."  That wall hanging is on the wall above my computer.  I see it a lot, and it's damn good advice.  Still working on taking that advice though.

My divorce was final August 5, 2013.  It was FAST.  I left Jason May 21, 2013.  Filed May 31, 2013 and it was final August 5.  I guess when both people decide there's no way to stay married and agree on how to split everything, it doesn't take long.  And I'm glad it was fast, because I needed to move on.  Still having a tough time with that, but it's getting easier.

Tomorrow, October 7, would have been my 13th wedding anniversary.  I'm really trying not to let that bother me.  In fact, I'm trying to look at it as THE point of me moving on.  I'm hoping that the date will miraculously be the kick in the pants that I need.  I'm not down in the dumps by any means, and I have more good days than bad.  But I need to move forward.

A BIG part of that moving forward is getting healthy again.  I've gained A LOT of weight back.  I'm having to wear bigger clothes and I can feel it.  I can feel that I've gotten bigger again.  It's not a lost cause, by any means, but I've got to get back to eating healthy and working out.  I want to.  I know I'll be happier.

So I'm hoping tomorrow is kind of a turning point for me, where I start going forward again, not backward.  I've been trying to do that for weeks now, and I haven't been able to do it consistently.  Hoping tomorrow, even though it's just a date on the calendar now, will help to change that.